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Fatin Nadirah
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Unofficially Graduated From Nitec Office Skills
Pursuing my passion in earlychildhood
at FLTC School


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Blissfully Attached
with Abdul Malek
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The Peeps Next Door

HUDA NABILAH

ILI MUNIRAH

ZULAIHA

ISWANDI

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CLEMENT

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2:13 AM

have you ever wonder what kind of life would you be leading in the years down the road? Or what might happen tomorrow,that one little mistake you make can change you whole life on that very day? there's always this saying that goes, "always look on the bright side as you wouldn't what would happen the next day", "even a small little mistakes can make a different in your life".

well,because of one small little mistake i did in the past,it made me who i am right now, a girl who used to be called by her friends & teachers sweet,polite and innocent girl is longed gone as time passed.it all started when everything were doing great where happiness and joy fills this life up with a jug of bright colours pouring in my life. to be a top student among the rest in the class was sure a wish come true, to be top for some of the subjects in the whole level another dream came true, to be called the intelligent,maybe i should used intelligent to describe me, i should say to be called as the clever girl,hardworking,honest,polite and full of respect to others. but it just took one mistake i done to take away all those from me,i could only feel all those happiness just for a while,for a year. sec 1 year was my most favourite year and precious year ever.

but things starts to changed a long the journey i took, after i met a guy and because of him i actually broke my promises to myself of not getting involve in relationships. it was not totally his fault but i guess when you are crazy over someone and just wish he would be the one by your side,nothing matters but only him will be stuck in your head. that was what i felt during that time. known him for so long but be with him just for a short while. no matter how long was the relationship or how short it was,i learnt a lot of things and i experience all the heart breaks ,dilemma, misery of letting go of the people you loved. you know what was the small mistake i done,that made me the way i am now? that was the mistake i done, that made me changed to the way i am now, of getting involved in relationship. the breaking of heart may passed, but i changed as time flew by. it was a drastic changed that can be easily detect by anyone,my family members,my friends and myself. someone who were once to be called as truely a wonderful girl is then starts to turn bad.

from obedient girl turned to a girl who disrespect people, rebel anytime she wants. from a girl with loveable nice attitude turns to a girl with attitude and try to do things her way instead. from an ugly duckling turning to be a swan, from a girl who is always shy and afraid of people turn to a girl had losts all that,just heck care with everyone. a girl who shy with guys,always talk to the girlfriends only turn to someone able to mix around with just any gender and age. to many things that had changed to be listed out. everything didnt stop there as she get herself involved with the people outside,mix around more to the guys, getting herself drown in more relationships and guys. my studies starts to get worse and when i reached sec 3 it got even worse that i had to almost stayed back another year.

sec 3 year i can say was the most wonderful year when i met a guy who brighten up my life but soon dark clouds starts to come back and surround the bright day. but all the memories that we made, was too great and i do really appreciate a lot even though i thought he would be the prince in my life when he's just the one who made my life and myself even more complicated. things got worse get involved with all the dirty stuffs. then when bot went separate ways, my life got worse get involved with different people, meet up with different people and sit with them. almost went for drinking with the guys,now starts smoking since that is just another way to unwind my stress. living in a nightmare every single day of my life when i'm like guys's sex toy. i'm just a girl who they come to me to satisfy their needs and desire also to fill up their loneliness days till they find someone new to be with them. mixing around with the bad companies where outside there are my friends who listen to my song of misery and sorrows,cheer me up if there's a need to.

everything that happened to me with a guy is a living nightmare that i would only wake up after anything that happened had ended. a nightmare that i would never want to remember. who am i to you people?! am a toy to you? come to me when you're lonely,come to me only if you need me, come to me to satisfy your needs and desire....are all that the reasons why you people actually reached me? and forget me when i'm not needed in your life anymore,when i'm just of no use in your life,throw me away when you're bored with me????!!!!,i really feel so dirty everytime i'm living in nightmare. all i wish was to be a simple girl, with a simple life..treat me well,treat me as a teenage girl.how i wish to be drifted away from the shore of misery,hate to get into trouble every now and then,get trouble with police & residents complains. tired of all these.

everyone wants to lead life with carefree, happiness no worried in anything,a simple life, life without troubles and also to be a better person that would be accept by the committe.