ok it is march school holiday,lots of homeworks need to be done. and i left with few more months to go before i hav eto sit for 'N' level,that the results would determine if i able to continue to sec5 to take my 'O' Level. just few minuts ago,i chatted with my boy and my friends from other school. glad to hear that many of them able to get into poly of thier choice. but along the way during the conversation,one of them ask me this question, "do you still have feelings towards him?". at first i though that 'him' refer to my ex but instead someone else, it refer to my boy instead. that was a good question i can say. cause after all those fights we had, i kinda had lost all the feelings and emotions. i don't know if i should be angry with him,sad because of what had happened, or just continue loving him like i did all these while or i should just keep my mouth shut. i don't really know what should i answer him or how i should answer his question but i did answr him straight a way. and i said 'i do still love him'. somehow i guess he know whats running on my mind, and he said ''follow what your heart say'', that phrase somehow seems so familiar. somehow i do get what he is trying to tell me. but again i said,i do still love him after all those fights we had. maybe not as strong as last time, but the feeling is still there.
then there this one time,someone said to me,that i'm popular with guys outside while he is just a popular guy around his friends and that without him i can have anyone by my side. somehow i did told even without him i would have anyone by my side eventhough they want to be with me. cause i don't change guys like i change my clothes. instead i refer them like diamonds, the polish diamonds or the unpolished diamonds. anyway enough about all that, these few days, i feel as though i'm back in the past but not.
i'm bored lately and really damn tired,don't know why. i feel tired and sleepy all day. then this friday have to come to school for some training workshop for councillors and is like so damn long from 8am in the morning till 5pm,like what the hell...
thats all,love you dear,take care
